Summer is Half Over!!!

I don't understand where the time goes!!! I remember when I was a child, summer seemed an unending time of lemonade drinking, fun in the sun, no school, softball games at the ballpark, working in tobacco :(, spending precious time with the family, season of pure, uninterrupted fun. Those three months of summer stand out in my childhood more than the nine months of school. Summer seemed so long!!! Now summer is just short!!! The misconception that teachers get the summer off is untrue for all teachers, but especially agriculture teachers. Since school dismissed on June 2, I have spent three weekdays at home. I am not trying to complain, because our family is blessed that I have a job. However, I look at the toll this lifestyle is taking on me and my family and wonder "Is this the ideal family life that God wants?" I am really struggling with this "career woman" vs. "full-time mom" internal battle and as of late, the "Full time Mom" is winning the battle. I realize that there are plenty of children that come from a double income family that are fabulous students in the classroom, respectable children to others and themselves, and who will be wonderful adults. I would also like to say that Abigail's preschool and Micah's daycare are wonderful, loving places for my children to go and would recommend them to any mom. However, I think the struggle is starting to become so prominent that I want to be at home instead of at work. I was so looking forward to summer and now it is half over. The remainder of summer consists of FFA camp, teacher's conference, professional developments, county fair, and school starts in one month:(. It is astonishing at how fast the summer goes and I don't feel like I have spent any quality time with the kids (granted, I was on vacation without the kids for one week....but sometimes that is needed.) Perhaps, Lord-willing, I will one day be able to stay at home with this children. I will continue to pray.